Aug
25
2009

My son says his teacher hates him

My fourth grade son hates his new class and says the teacher doesn’t like him. He doesn’t want to go to school in the morning saying that he doesn’t have any friends. Should I ask the principal for a new teacher? His best friend that he has been in class with for the past 2 years has a different teacher this year.

I think that you need to start by asking your child for specific examples of why he thinks his teacher doesn’t like him. I’d set up a conference so that the teacher is aware of the situation and his reluctance to go to school. The teacher should have some ideas of what she can do to make your son more comfortable in class. It’s never a good idea to move a child to be with a friend. School is all about making new friends and forming relationships and you need to encourage your son to get to know his new classmates outside of school as well. That being said, if your son continues to have issues with the teacher and they are not being resolved it could be a matter of chemistry, sometimes a child and a teacher just aren’t on the same page. In that case if you’ve met with the teacher a few times its perfectly acceptable to go to the principal about a class change. However, I’d avoid the class where his best friend is in hopes that he’ll broaden his social circle by meeting others.

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  • Absolutely make a conference with the teacher…quickly. This needs to be resolved. But don’t go in and accuse the teacher. She’s an ally who wants the best for your son. She can do things to make him feel she likes him. She just needs to know. Just share your concerns. I taught 4th grade for 35 years. This once happened to me, and it couldn’t have been further from the truth. It was a great student….but he had other issues happening in his family and his self esteem was hurting. Kids do need to learn how to deal with all kind of people. Parents can make up for the lack of warmth at home if needed. If she’s a good teacher, encourage him to learn and not worry about whether she likes him.

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